The table data below shows the average band scores for students from different language groups taking the IELTS General Test in 2010.

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The table data below shows the average band scores for students from different language groups taking the IELTS General Test in 2010.

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The table data illustrates the average band scores for students from different language groups taking the IELTS General Test in 2010. The main feature that stands out from the table is there are four nations that participated as the basic data, namely

German

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Germany

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, French,

Indonesia

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, and Malaysia.

In addition

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, the

score

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derived from the IELTS General test ranged from 6.0 as the lowest

score

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to 6.9 as the highest result.

To sum up

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, the highest average results are booked by German which makes up 6.7 scores. In contrary

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apply

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Indonesia

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is recording the least number of 6.3

overall

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score

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scores

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. The second biggest number is accounted

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for by

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French and followed by Malaysia with the results 6.5 and 6.4 respectively.

Moreover

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, speaking is one of the aspects that highly contributed to increasing the

overall

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score

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while

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reading and writing are the most difficult aspects for the IETLS participants.

Following

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this

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Indonesia

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and French have the lowest number for the reading aspect which accounts for 6.1,

also

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Indonesia

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and Malaysia record the bad result for writing with 6.1 and 6.0

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score

Fix the agreement mistake

scores

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consecutively.

adimk02Sun Mar 19 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 88%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words indonesia, score with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "data" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

179 words

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The table data below shows the average band scores for students from different language groups taking the IELTS General Test in 2010.

Children have to be educated but they also have to be allowed to learn things by themselves. To what extent do you agree? How will education develop in the future?

People nowadays tend to have children at older ages. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that the main purpose of education is to prepare people to be useful members for society. Others say that the purpose of education is to achieve personal wishes. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.