Poor nutrition and obesity is a problem in many developed countries and some people believe that a tax on fast food would reduce the problem. Do you agree?

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Nowadays fast food is considered the main cause of obesity.
Although
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some people believe that
this
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disease influences only their appearance, it actually has more severe consequences which affect health,
therefore
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,
this
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problem requires an immediate solution. Society supposes that taxation would improve the situation and I firmly advocate
this
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opinion.
This
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essay will provide arguments for my point of view.
To begin
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with, the main audience of fast food restaurants are teenagers, who usually do not have a well-paid job and
receives
Correct subject-verb agreement
receive
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money from their parents.
Consequently
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,
this
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age group selects restaurants based on their financial abilities.
Moreover
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, the youth often do not look after their health properly and
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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not notified about the aftermaths of the lack of essential vitamins and elements.
For instance
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, students in the breaks prefer to visit places, where they are able to eat inexpensively and swiftly, in order to not be late for the next class.
Furthermore
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, from the economic approach, when there is a rise in prices on one market, in
this
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case, because of the taxes, the public will buy goods substitutes, videlicet healthier meals. The quantity demanded of fast food will decrease and
this
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provokes an increased supply of organic products, which results in the rise of competition in the market and leads to a drop in prices.
In addition
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,
this
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contributes to the solution of the poor nutrition problem, because more people can afford to purchase decent eating.
For example
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, with the farmers' product costs declining more people will be able to eat well at home. In conclusion, from the arguments and examples given, I strongly believe that taxation would influence the situation in a positive way.
Submitted by nastyarozenson.17 on

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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are vague and do not clearly address the prompt. Expand on the main points and connect them to the thesis.
task achievement
Ensure that the essay addresses all aspects of the prompt clearly and cohesively. Provide specific examples and elaborate on each point to support your argument.
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