It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Some

people

say that taking

risks

plays an important role in both workplaces and individuals' daily lives. I would say that there are more positive developments rather than negative ones when

people

try to overcome a dangerous situation.

To begin

with, taking

risks

may lead to irreplaceable consequences.

In other words

, in terms of one's safety and well-being,

people

should follow safety guidelines to keep themselves away from danger. To illustrate

this

, drivers must wear a helmet when they ride a motorbike. If they do not wear it properly, like

for enjoying

Change preposition

to enjoy

show examples

the high speed with thrill, it will lead them to get serious injuries.

In particular

, professional fields

such

as businesses dealing with money should always choose safer ways. When one wrong choice is made, it might result in a disastrous result like an economic recession.

Nevertheless

, choosing risky methods does not always show poor results. Employees sometimes take dangerous routes to maximize revenue, by putting tremendous effort

to turn

Change preposition

into turning

show examples

high

risks

into new opportunities. If their strategies work, the workers can make huge profits by focusing on solving the given task.

In addition

, in daily ,lives children sometimes learn a new rule from taking

risks

For example

, if they do not brush their teeth well, they will

be suffered

Wrong verb form

suffer

show examples

from cavities in the near future.

This

means that they will realize the pivotalness of taking good care of themselves in terms of hygiene.

To sum up

, there are both upsides and downsides to taking

risks

people

's work and lives. Yet, I strongly think that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages for the financial benefits and learning a lesson.

Submitted by 98shs on Thu Mar 23 2023

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coherence and cohesion

Provide clearer and more explicit examples to support your points.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

270 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

The government should close companies that produce toxic waste materials without their own waste treatment facility in order to protect the envirnonment. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard. what are the advantages and disadvantages?

In many countries paying for things using mobile phones (cell phone ) apps is becoming increasingly common .Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages ?

In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own countries. Nowadays, they have more opportunities to study abroad. What are the advantages and the disadvantages of this development?

Writing Task 2: You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?