IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together.to what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages
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i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 agree with the viewpoint that
music
Use synonyms
 is a good approach to
combination
Add an article
the combination
a combination
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 of various cultures and ages together. first,like the
arts
Change the noun form
art
show examples
 work,
music
Use synonyms
 is a
mean
Fix the agreement mistake
means
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of
Change preposition
by
show examples
what
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 composers and
performancers
Correct your spelling
performances
performers
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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express their creations,
enmotions
Correct your spelling
emotions
 and the experience of their
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
when
audience
Correct article usage
the audience
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listening
Add the preposition
tolistening
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 the
muisc
Correct your spelling
music
 they could generate resonance with the creators which maybe they have some identical points or feelings,it’s like a mental bridge that could connect people’s heart,in there,no matter where you come from,what ages you are,everyone can communicate with each other in the field that
music
Use synonyms
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
 in.
secondly
Linking Words
,the diversity of
music
Use synonyms
indicate
Change the verb form
indicates
show examples
 the different cultures of
creator’s
Correct article usage
the creator’s
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backgound
Correct your spelling
background
,
while
Linking Words
some times
Correct your spelling
sometimes
show examples
 the
inspriation
Correct your spelling
inspiration
 of the
music
Use synonyms
 comes from other countries,
for example
Linking Words
,the famous musician
debussy
Change the capitalization
Debussy
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,his orchestral
muisc
Correct your spelling
music
 sea which consist of three
chapter
Change to a plural noun
chapters
show examples
,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
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insprated
Correct your spelling
inspired
inspected
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
katsushika
Change the capitalization
Katsushika
show examples
hokusai
Change the capitalization
Hokusai
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 a master of
ukiyoe
Correct your spelling
ukiyo-e
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 painting,it
implys
Correct your spelling
implies
 the interact of arts,there
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 no boundary,we could make the
culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
 fusion.
finally
Linking Words
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
think
Add the particle
tothink
show examples
cultivate
Wrong verb form
cultivating
show examples
 someone’s
interesting
Replace the word
interest
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as
music
Use synonyms
,
arts
Correct word choice
and arts
show examples
 is very imperative,
cause
Correct word choice
because
show examples
 it will significantly broaden your
knowlege
Correct your spelling
knowledge
,let you discover different cultures and apply it
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 your work
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
,
then
Linking Words
 your perspective,mind and imagination will be more profound.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
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