The government should spend money on promoting sport and art in schools, rather than sponsoring professional sports and art events in communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

When the issue of how
government
should spend
money
comes into view, there exist conflicting opinions. I partially agree that
government
should focus on sponsoring professional
sports
and art events more than promoting the same topics at
schools
. An investment made by the
government
is very critical for the
development
of arts and
sports
. I believe that the investment will provide better opportunities for national athletes or artists ;
however
, I can't fully support
this
statement since nothing impression it gives.
On the other hand
, investing
money
in
schools
for arts and
sports
will help
children
develop critical thinking and persistence.
Both
sides have their own merits, which will be outlined below.
To begin
with, the national athletes or artists rely heavily on
government
money
in order for them to able to excel and perform in an international competition.
Both
professionals need to start developing their talents from their earliest stage by joining communities event.
Moreover
, the
money
given by the
government
can be utilized to give the best facilities possible. One example is by providing facilities with international standards.
Therefore
, they can develop their talents and excel in upcoming competitions.
On the other hand
, we will discuss the importance of investment in arts and
sports
at
schools
. Education plays a very important part in
children
's
development
. Most
schools
provide art and
sports
as a part of their curriculum.
Both
subjects can help
children
to develop critical thinking, persistence and creativity.
For example
,
sports
require problem-solving as a part of critical thinking and persistence to be able to win the game.
In addition
to that,
sports
allow
children
to learn how to manage a team and work together.
For instance
, some types of
sports
require two groups of people to play the game. Even though investing in
schools
may seem a small step but it is very critical for the
development
of
children
. To sums up, where there are arguments for
both
sides, I believe that it is better for
government
to invest their
money
in promoting
sports
and art at
schools
.
This
step will help the
development
of our future generation since it helps to build a strong character and critical thinking.
Submitted by alifahrc on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: