IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The number of people who choose to get married is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #future
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There is a view that a lot of
people
Use synonyms
 will not choose to get married in the
future
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, unlike the current young generation start their own families. I am for with the statement and I will give my reasons below. One of the main reasons that the young tend to not get married in the
future
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 is
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
 modern society is not an ideal place to raise their children. First of all, housing is essential for starting a family since owning a house gives
people
Use synonyms
 a sense of security.
However
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, not only housing shortage in the city areas but
also
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 renting or purchasing a house has become more costly than in the past.
In addition
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, no kids zones and
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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high crime rates make
people
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this
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 world is not a safe place to give good care to their children.
This
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 result in young couples giving up to get married. A recent survey showed that the reason why the younger generation does not consider getting married is finding a place to live in became a huge burden to them. Another key factor is that a number of young
people
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 assume marriage is a simple choice rather than a must-do in one's life. Since they consider an individual's happiness as crucial than following social norms.
Therefore
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, they do not want to sacrifice by getting married and accepting social pressure to get married and have kids.
For example
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, it is evident that more and more
people
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 choose not to get married and live alone, by easing their burden which came from social pressure.
To sum up
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, I strongly agree that the younger generation will no longer
to
Add a missing verb
have to
show examples
tochoose
Correct your spelling
choose
 get married in their
future
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 lives.
This
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 is mainly because the
future
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 environment is not ideal to start a family
due to
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 the high price of housing.
Moreover
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, they do not want to adopt the old customs that make the young carry the burden of getting married.
Submitted by 98shs on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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