children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. few people believe taht goverment has the responsibility to solve this problem. to what extent do you agree or disagree.

#children #people #taht #goverment #responsibility

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Nowadays ,

the

Correct article usage

apply

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obesity and junk food

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

been

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

great

concerns

Correct the article-noun agreement

concern

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among youth. And I agree that the government should intervene in

this

Linking Words

issue.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the officials should start

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

programmes in the schools that should include various sessions like

Remove the comma

apply

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video training and lectures which deals with the harmful effects of overweight and unhealthy food among children.

For example

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

show examples

india

Change the capitalization

India

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report suggests that around 80

percent

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per cent

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of the youth is suffering from

cholestrol

Correct your spelling

cholesterol

and heart attacks at

young

Add an article

a young

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age.

Furthermore

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, the government and parents should come together and motivate their kids to indulge in sports activities like running,swimming etc.

This

Linking Words

will not only help children to control their weight but it will

also

Linking Words

make them competitive in their life which will lead them to live

a successful lives

Correct the article-noun agreement

a successful life

successful lives

show examples

To conclude

Linking Words

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Change the capitalization

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would say that the government and parents should help their children to understand the harmful effects of consuming unhealthy foods and

consequences

Correct article usage

the consequences

show examples

of being overweight.

Submitted by vibhorjindal02 on Tue Mar 28 2023

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

159 words

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children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. few people believe taht goverment has the responsibility to solve this problem. to what extent do you agree or disagree.

Fully explain your ideas

Today many young people spend too much of thier free time at shopping malls.This can be considered negative for young people and society generally.To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement.

You bought a phone recently, but you are dissatisfied about quality. Write a letter to manager.

Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Should education and healthcare be free of charge and funded by the government, or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services?

You recently learned that a close friend of yours has had a baby, and you purchased a gift for the baby. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter, you should: Congratulate them on the arrival of the baby. Describe the gift you have chosen for the baby.