IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environment problems . Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #time #loss #species #plants #animals #environment
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the modern world , environmental issues have become a major concern for most countries .some argue extinction of rare species has become a serious environmental crisis nowadays.
Whereas
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, others believe that there are other
problems
Use synonyms
 that need to be taken
to
Change preposition
into
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 consideration.
This
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 essay will discuss both notions
along with
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 my opinion. It is obvious that many species are becoming extinct from
this
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 world , and the main reason why some individuals
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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assume
that is
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 important to notify is because of
loss
Correct article usage
the loss
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 of habitation of
those kind
Change the determiner
that kind
those kinds
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 of species, and
this
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 has
being
Change the verb form
to be
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 the
results
Fix the agreement mistake
result
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 of deforestation and climate changes in
environment
Add an article
the environment
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 . Eventually, causing
problems
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 with the momentum of nature.
For example
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, we can see that in Antarctica glaciers are melting down significantly . Thereby, causing issues in the survival of polar bears .
However
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 , there are other environmental
problems
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 that are more concerning like water and
air
Use synonyms
 pollution. Today ,
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
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 of plastic and the dumping of chemicals
to
Change preposition
into
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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water bodies are increasing significantly and as a ,
result
Add the preposition
inresult
fromresult
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 marine creatures are dying out dramatically because of several reasons like high ph value or poisonous chemicals.
Moreover
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 ,
air
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 quality these days
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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also
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 agitating . As we can see
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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, there is a noticeable increase vehicle usage in these days, and
as a result
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 , the rate of carbon dioxide and
other chemical
Change the wording
another chemical
other chemicals
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 in
Use synonyms
air
Add an article
the air
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also
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 increasing . Thereby , causing different health
problems
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 in people.
For instance
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, in
Delhi
Add a comma
,Delhi
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 the visibility of
air
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 is poor because of the huge traffic conjunction and burning of materials like plastic and other things.
To conclude
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,
loss
Correct article usage
the loss
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 of plants and animals
Add the comma(s)
, as well as other environment problems,
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as well as
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 other
environment
Replace the word
environmental
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problems
Use synonyms
 are really concerning factors.
Therefore
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 , I think that
are
Change the verb form
is
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 should concentrate on both issues for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Survival
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
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 planet.
Submitted by varshajose345 on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem
  • ecological balance
  • pollinators
  • keystone species
  • extinction
  • ecosystem services
  • pollination
  • water purification
  • climate regulation
  • climate change
  • deforestation
  • pollution
  • environmental degradation
  • illegal wildlife trade
  • conservation
  • sustainability
  • preservation
  • habitat destruction
  • endangered species
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