IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#businesses #emphasise #products #development
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In their advertising,
businesses
Use synonyms
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
 sometimes stress that their
products
Use synonyms
 are new in some way. From my point of view, some
businesses
Use synonyms
 want to have good
products
Use synonyms
 to give to the people, but
usually
Add a comma
,usually
show examples
 they worry about their
products
Use synonyms
are
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 newer than some other's
Use synonyms
businesses
Change noun form
businesses'
business's
show examples
products
Use synonyms
.
In
Correct your spelling
I
show examples
think
Add a comma
,think
show examples
 it is a negative development, because when
businesses
Use synonyms
 stress about the quality of their
products
Use synonyms
, sometimes they do something wrong
while
Linking Words
 they are producing them. It is good when
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
businesses
Use synonyms
 take care of and look after their
products
Use synonyms
 but with a limit.
According to
Linking Words
 some experts, when you take a lot of care of something, you will probably do some things, about it, wrong. From my own experience, I was trying to make three school projects, which my teachers asked me to do, and despite my hard work and because I was stressed about the projects I had to do, I
finally
Linking Words
 failed because I had made a lot of mistakes.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
businesses
Use synonyms
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
 should not stress about their
products
Use synonyms
 being new in some way.
Besides
Linking Words
that
Add a comma
,that
show examples
 they should calm down and be careful
on
Change preposition
about
show examples
 what they are producing.
Submitted by slobodanatol83 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
What to do next:
Look at other essays: