IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

These days, in many countries fewer and fewer people want to become teachers, particularly in secondary schools. What are reasons for this and how could the problem be solved?

#countries #people #teachers #schools
Teachers
 play an important role in every human life. They help and teach others about the knowledge they have. The
teachers
 are the builder of the child's dream.
However
, in modern society, the number of
teachers
 is increasingly decreasing for some
reasons
. In
this
 passage, I will discuss the main
reasons
 why there are fewer people who want to become a
teacher
, especially secondary
teachers
.
This
 may affect the health and the
work
 of the
teacher
 the following. The most important
reasons
 why teaching is ignored gradually are the pressure on
work
 and low income. First of all, it is the pressure on the working time and continuing
work
 hours without having time for their children and other relationships for a long time, which has made them unexcited and discharged them from teaching. In some countries
such
 as Vietnam, thousands of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teachers
 have to teach
to
Change preposition
until
show examples
 ten o'clock
last
 night
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
 complete their own responsibilities to family.
Secondly
, the
teacher
's salaries are paid lower compared to other professions, which is not quite deserted to the efforts they spend.
As a result
, many
teachers
 have to do some extra
work
 as online selling or teaching more hours at home to cover their lives.
Finally
, many students have identified the areas where they pursue,
hence
 most of them are not selected to become
teachers
. In conclusion, there are many different
reasons
 for leading to the decrease in the number of people who want to be a
teacher
. To resolve
this
 issue government should take some specific actions
Submitted by anhnguhongmai on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: