The diagram below shows the process of producing smoked fish.

The diagram below shows the process of producing smoked fish.
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the diagram illustrates the
process
by which smoked
fish
is made.
overall
, it can be seen that the
process
of making smoked
fish
requires 13 stages in total. it starts with
fish
being caught on the beach by large ships and culminates when the final product is delivered to shops for selling to customers . looking at the detail, in the first stage,
fish
collected by ships on the beach is later transported to the port, and
then
the
fish
is frozen and thawed . afterwards, these
fish
is put into a box, which contains fresh water inside in order to remove dirt before being cut openly. the
process
continues with
fish
being mixed with yellow colouring and salt water.
subsequently
, the coloured
fish
is put into a smoking container, which is frozen and thawed again in the following step. being distributed by trucks to
fish
shops for selling wraps up the
process
.
Submitted by bobong120906 on

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words process, fish with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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