Some people say that the experiences a child has before starting school have the most influence on their future life. Others say that experiences as a teenager, especially at school, are more influential. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

One of the social concerns today relates to the most appropriate
time
for
children
’s
experiences
.
While
it is widely believed that a child has
experiences
Change the verb form
experienced
show examples
prior to their
school
time
is the most influence on their future
life
, others believe teenager
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
acquirement at
school
are more significant. In my opinion, these two points are reasonable. On the one hand, it is argued that the
experiences
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
gotten before
school
age are the most important. The main reason is that the
kids
can create anything they want. If parents know how to create a playground for their
children
to develop thinking, these
children
will have strong thinking later on. There are many useful activities for
children
such
as pretending to be cartoon characters, playing jigsaw
puzzle
Fix the agreement mistake
puzzles
show examples
,
participating
Correct word choice
and participating
show examples
in suitable sports. Because game impersonating characters has a lot of impact on
children
, their emotions and creativity of situations will be enhanced when imitating. The next reason is that
children
learn
much needed
Add a hyphen
much-needed
show examples
social knowledge from their families. Obviously, parents and grandparents have many valuable
experiences
or lessons in
life
.
Therefore
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
kids
should be taught from an early age to avoid obstacles and to be able to protest strongly at
anytime
Replace the word
any time
show examples
.
This
is considered to give
children
a better experience from childhood than
kids
who are too wrapped up.
On the other hand
, it is strongly believed by others that teenagers
get
Correct pronoun usage
who get
show examples
much practical experience at
school
are influential. People have
this
opinion because
children
will change their
personality
Fix the agreement mistake
personalities
show examples
and perception when they reach puberty.
In adolescence
Change preposition
Adolescence
show examples
is the
time
when some become extravagant, lose control of their behaviour or
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
become brooding and anxious.
Specially
Replace the word
Especially
show examples
,
school
is the best place to make a young person a well-rounded adult. Students not only acquire basic knowledge of the subjects
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
they are learned about social awareness.
Hence
,
experiences
in schooling can
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
children
’s
life
too much. In conclusion,
experiences
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
gotten before
school
time
have an influence on
kid’s
Correct article usage
a kid’s
show examples
future
life
.
However
, schooling is
also
the best
time
for teenagers to develop. In my opinion, both
kids
and teenagers should be educated
appropriated
Replace the word
appropriately
show examples
.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • influence
  • future life
  • experiences
  • childhood development
  • bonding
  • socialization
  • peer interactions
  • basic skills
  • education
  • learning
  • friendships
  • independence
  • identity
  • exposure
  • new ideas
  • perspectives
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