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Band 6.5

Computers today can quickly and accurately translate languages; therefore, it is a waste of time to learn a foreign language. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#computers #languages #waste #time #language
One school of thought holds that acquiring knowledge of a foreign vocabulary should be
Correct article usage
a
show examples
wasted
time
due to
 the accuracy of cutting-edge technologies
such
 as computers.
While
 I accept that
this
 perception is somewhat justifiable, I believe that studying another accent could bring a plethora of benefits for learners. On the one hand, it is understandable that translating various languages by appliances is advantageous to a certain extent.
Firstly
, these methods could help people save
time
. Specifically,
instead
 of spending the lead
time
 studying new languages, they could easily understand them clearly through online tools on the Internet, thereby they could have more hours for enriching their life experiences and taking care of their family or even themselves.
Secondly
, computers could have users convert speech abroad into their mother tongue in an exact way.
This
 perspective could be
further
 by the fact that sometimes humans could make mistakes in speaking because
this
 is not their first language,
therefore
 causing numerous misunderstandings in the speech
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and confusion for both speaker and listener.
On the other hand
, notwithstanding the aforementioned advantages, there are a host of compelling reasons why I am convinced that spending
time
 studying a new dialect could bring a myriad of benefits for people. One key rationale in favour of
this
 view is that people could be exposed to a new culture.
For example
, when foreigners study Vietnamese, it means they not only study about words but
also
 gain an understanding of historical costumes
as well as
 indigenous practices in the locality. Another justification is that learners could nurture their talent.
This
 is because acquiring a skill in another style could help them detect their language abilities, and
then
 enhance them. In conclusion,
while
 it is irrefutable that smart devices could help inhabitants understand foreign languages quickly
as well as
 accurately, I would contend that becoming competent in different ones could have many positive impacts.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position throughout and tackles both sides of the argument effectively, which is great for Task Achievement. However, ensure that your examples are specific and directly related to the topic. For instance, the mention of 'historical costumes' in Vietnamese culture isn't directly tied to language learning benefits.
coherence cohesion
In the realm of Coherence and Cohesion, your structure is solid with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, you should work on ensuring smoother transitions between points and paragraphs. Some of your sentences could be made more concise for better readability.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion are effectively articulated, providing a strong framework for your essay. This does well to set the stage and finalize your arguments convincingly.
logical structure
The essay does a commendable job of presenting a balanced view and offering points to support both perspectives. This enhances the logical structure of your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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