IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

31. Schools are no longer necessary because children can get so much information available through the internet, and they can study just as well at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#schools #children #information #internet #study #home
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Schools
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 have been the primary institutions of education providing knowledge in a
sytematic
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systematic
 manner
since
Change preposition
for
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 ages. But in the current era of
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 and technology, there is
emerging
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an emerging
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 debate about the importance and need of
schools
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. I disagree that
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 can replace
schools
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 as it cannot provide
an
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apply
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organized, need specific and personalised instruction which is needed at the initial stages of education as
schools
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 do.
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Schools
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School
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The school
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 are organized in terms of their planning, operations and improvement practices. Schooling being the very
intial
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initial
 stage of
child's
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a child's
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 academic career needs properly planned activities presented in an orderly manner.
Internet
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 is
divese
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diverse
 but it cannot provide
Linking Words
such
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a such
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organized
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an organized
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 set of activities without a proper institution. So,
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the school
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school
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schools
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 are needed for
the
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apply
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proper schooling even if they are in a distant or online mode.
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Internet
Correct article usage
The Internet
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 is exceptionally rich in its
resouces
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resources
 but it still
cant
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can't
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 replace
the
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apply
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schools
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.
Students
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 do not all
what
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that
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 is available on
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internet
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the internet
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 but
specific
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specifically
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 related
resurces
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resources
.
Students
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 are not capable enough to filter these resources suitable for their level.
Schools
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 help to align these
need specific
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need-specific
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resouces
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resources
 in a suitable manner. Most importantly,
schools
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 are the institutions where
students
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 can get one on one information, they can ask questions to solve their queries.
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Internet
Add an article
The Internet
show examples
 can not provide
such
Linking Words
 instruction to younger
students
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.
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Internet
Correct article usage
The Internet
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 is very diverse in its nature but it simply cannot replace
schools
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.
Use synonyms
Internet
Add an article
The Internet
show examples
 can help to improve instruction but cannot serve as a complete medium for initial education and learning.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • social development
  • fostering communication
  • personalized guidance
  • immediate feedback
  • replicated
  • structured environments
  • discipline
  • time management skills
  • extracurricular activities
  • nurture talents
  • inculcate
  • sense of community
  • shared learning experiences
  • equal access
  • learning opportunities
What to do next:
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