The charts illustrate four types of destination including part-time work, voluntary work, further study and unemployment that graduate and postgraduate students did after leaving the university in 2008.

The charts illustrate four types of destination including part-time work, voluntary work, further study and unemployment that graduate and postgraduate students did after leaving the university in 2008.
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The graphs set out four
further
Linking Words
orientations that graduated
students
Use synonyms
did after pursuing their degree from the university in 2008. Generally,
while
Linking Words
studying
further
Linking Words
was the most likely choice, voluntary jobs were the least popular among graduates and postgraduates. Considering the UK graduates, as mentioned above, most of them wanted to pursue
further
Linking Words
study with around 30,000
students
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, around 18,000
students
Use synonyms
wanted to land a part-time job, and the same amount of them was unemployed which left only 3,500
students
Use synonyms
doing volunteer work. The same trend was witnessed with the postgraduates.
However
Linking Words
, the top choice is now shared between
further
Linking Words
study and part-time occupation with approximately 2,500
students
Use synonyms
for each selection. There were 1,600
students
Use synonyms
unemployed after pursuing their Master's degree or PhD and only 350
students
Use synonyms
chose to work non-paid. In conclusion, through data in 2008, UK graduates and postgraduates seemed to focus on studying and part-time jobs before being ready for permanent occupation.
Submitted by bta.abbey on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further".
Vocabulary: Replace the words students with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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