Some people think that children should be taken in control by their parents while others argue that they need to learn to be independent. Discuss both views and give you opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

In society's recent times, many

parents

Use synonyms

think that their heirs should be taken care of by them, and on the other side, someone would like their kids to live independently in their adolescent lives. In my point of view, I will discuss both ideas and provide my statement below. On the one hand, children, who are heavily affected by the dramatic changes in society now, could be easy victims of violence.

Additionally

Linking Words

, teenagers often have a high chance of accessing drugs, wine, and cigarettes, which will lead them into bad habits

such

Linking Words

as fighting, stealing, and so on. Take me

for example

Linking Words

, when I was a student at a secondary school, without supervision from my

parents

Use synonyms

, I often didn't go to school and gathered with my bad friends to steal stocks at the supermarket.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, encouraging boys and girls to be independent, which is a modern way for their

parents

Use synonyms

to raise them, stimulates them to be more active in learning.

Besides

Linking Words

, the kids access the internet not only more quickly than their

parents

Use synonyms

but

also

Linking Words

more effectively than other old people.

For example

Linking Words

, I see my 10-year-old cousin chatting with the Open AI to complete all of his homework at home in only 2 hours,

whereas

Linking Words

in my experience, I need at least 4 hours to complete

this

Linking Words

homework because the OpenAI suggests a better method to finish tonnes of homework easily.

Therefore

Linking Words

, for me, I suggest that mature people inform scions how to be themselves as soon as possible. To be honest, when children are inspired by what is good for them, they can make everything more efficient. In my conclusion,

although

Linking Words

the old sometimes look at their kids day by day, I offer that every family should let the children be less dependent in our lives.

Submitted by joseph.bachle on Sat Apr 01 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

302 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
In some countries, many people do not have enough money to access the internet. Should governments be responsible for ensuring that everyone can get access to the internet?
The Internet has changed the way we perceive day to day activities. It has affected major walks of life and given entertainment a new perspective. Majority of the western countries have digitally revolutionised and everyone has access to the internet while in other parts of the world it is still considered as a luxury. It is often argued that governments should be responsible for ensuring that everyone can get access to the internet. I personally do not believe that it is the government’s responsibility to provide free internet access to everyone as it is quite an unreasonable demand. In this essay, I will support my opinion with examples.
5
band
There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
Academic succesion has been addicted by some people in the society. Many individuals claim that non academic subjects are not as crucial as academic ones. It is disagreed that non academic subjects such as cooking and mechanic skills should eleminated by universities. This essay, will discuss why such skills are important and give examples about it.
4.5
band
The number of older people is increasing. Some people think that this will cause problems in their countries; others believe this group is important to society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion
One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is private cars in city centres
5
band
Many people argue that restaurants should be required to disclose the nutritional information of the dishes they serve. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
In the modern era, there has been a growing tendency of individuals to eat fast food which leads some people to suggest that all eating places should give information on nutritional composition on each menu. Personally, there are many benefits of this idea outweigh the drawbacks and this essay will discuss about it.
6
band
instead of requiring primary school students to do experiments themselves, schools should only alllow them to watch experiments demonstrated by teachers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
nstead of requiring primary school students to do experiments themselves, schools should only alllow them to watch experiments demonstrated by teachers.

Some people think that children should be taken in control by their parents while others argue that they need to learn to be independent. Discuss both views and give you opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries, many people do not have enough money to access the internet. Should governments be responsible for ensuring that everyone can get access to the internet?

The number of older people is increasing. Some people think that this will cause problems in their countries; others believe this group is important to society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Many people argue that restaurants should be required to disclose the nutritional information of the dishes they serve. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

instead of requiring primary school students to do experiments themselves, schools should only alllow them to watch experiments demonstrated by teachers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?