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Band 5.5

In many countries, government spent large sum of money on the arts, and this is supported by some taxpayers as both why. Other, however, think that this money would be better spent on health and education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#countries #government #sum #money #arts #taxpayers #health #education
Individuals are split when it comes to government spending. Some of them who are paying taxes in most nations are of the belief that government should spend a large
amount
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number
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 of money
fundings
Fix the agreement mistake
funding
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 on
art
. Others
on
Add the comma(s)
,on
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 the contrary, argue that it is better to spend that money on health and
education
 systems. There are valid arguments on both sides, which I will discuss and conclude by clearly stating my viewpoint. On the one hand, proponents of
art
 claim that
art
 is the most important aspect of an individual's life as it represents daily life and amusements
for instance
 photography, painting
as well as
 museums.
Initially
, there is a common belief that
art
 can result in people's patriotism. More importantly,
art
 and relevant industries of
art
 can result in a good picture of one's nation
in
Change preposition
apply
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worldwide and it could be helpful in tourism attraction so all expenses could be considered as a huge investment in the tourism industry with a good rate of interest. From another angle, opponents respond that
while
 there are important issues
for example
 people's health or the
education
 system there should be a priority list for policymakers to spend taxes on them. Primarily, it is obvious that without a healthy
community
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,community
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 it is unlikely to perform well in other aspects including
art
.
Moreover
, for having a prosperous country there should be a good and well-designed
education
 system to nurture artists for the future.
As a result
, from my ,perspective I tend to agree with the advocates of investment in health and
education
,
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apply
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 since they have a more robust argument.
Submitted by m.beirami2008 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • allocate
  • funding
  • cultural heritage
  • attracts tourism
  • fosters creativity
  • innovation
  • enriches
  • quality of life
  • national pride
  • educates
  • historical
  • contemporary
  • societal issues
  • essential services
  • well-being
  • productivity
  • socio-economic development
  • healthier and more educated populace
  • philanthropy
  • taxpayer money
  • balancing funding
  • cultural enrichment
  • populace
  • proportional allocation of resources
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