Some people believe that animal should be allowed to be eaten and experimented on while other think they have equal right as human being, discuss both views and your opinion.
Many
people
have been supporting
the idea that Wrong verb form
support
animals
should be eaten by people
and experimented on by industries, but others advocate that animals
must have some rights just like humans. However
, this
topic is a little bit uncomfortable to talk about for many reasons, such
as people
`s religion, culture and beliefs. To support both thoughts I`m going to bring up some good pieces of information in this
essay.
To be honest, I`m not an expert on this
topic, however
, part of society defends animals
such
as mice, and rabbits, and so should have experimented on at least to discover new medicines. To support it, the New York Times brings up some information about the Covid-19
vaccine and tests in Correct your spelling
COVID-19
animals
were extremely important for good results. In my vision, animal is the only way to become
society safe from viruses and Verb problem
keep
others
diseases.
Correct quantifier usage
other
On the other hand
, we have been living in an interconnected world where people
are in touch with different cultures through the internet. For example
, Brazil`s folk know exactly what happen
in Asia. Indeed, Wrong verb form
happened
this
looks crazy to Brazilian
, but many countries in the Asia continent prohibit Replace the word
Brazilians
people
to eat
some Change preposition
from eating
animals
like caw, actually. Honestly, my opinion is that we have been living in a democracy and each one has the right for thinking
and believe in a different way, Change preposition
to think
otherwise
, it can not determine the future of humanity.
In conclusion, I believe that each one can have their own choice about eating or not the animal
, but unfortunately, they can`t determine if is correct or not to use Fix the agreement mistake
animals
animals
in their experiences to find new solutions for society.Submitted by murilo.siqueira2012 on
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task response
The essay lacks a clear and comprehensive analysis of the topic, and fails to provide relevant specific examples to support the arguments. There is a need to address the topic more directly and in a detailed manner.
coherence and cohesion
The essay's introduction and conclusion are present, but the logical structure of the essay is weak. The essay lacks a coherent flow of ideas and does not effectively link the supporting points with the main argument.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite