Completing university education is thought by some to be th ebest way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developng soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion?

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One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is that obtaining good
work
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needs a
degree
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,
while
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others consider that needing abilities and
experience
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. It is undeniable that knowledge has become an essential part of
work
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.
This
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essay will discuss both these points of view and argue in favour of the latter. A commonly held belief is that higher education may give you an excellent
job
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. As evidence, they point to a
job
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that needs your knowledge and a fine
degree
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very demanding aspect of their
work
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.
Furthermore
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, the higher not only receive a wonderful
job
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, but
also
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without a
degree
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can't attain promotion in
work
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. It could be explained by the fact that the police department will require your law
degree
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to enhance your status, even if you gain
experience
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.
As a result
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, it leads to a
degree
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that could improve your
work
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in the future.
On the other hand
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, people claim that soft
skills
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will be beneficial in
work
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.
For example
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, they may mention that with
experience
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can get a
job
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quickly and will not require adaptation.
In addition
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, soft
skills
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attain more benefits that you will not face issues
while
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you are working. The explanation lies in the fact that more workers do not obtain the
job
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abilities, and because of
this
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, it will impact your reputation
due to
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you not being able to do you completely.
Therefore
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,
skills
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play a crucial role in
work
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, you can complete your missions simply. In conclusion, soft
skills
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and a
degree
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influence
work
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.
However
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, I believe that to receive a superb
job
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, you need education and
experience
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. These aspects are useful for your
job
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.

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coherence and cohesion
Your introduction clearly states the issue at hand; however, consider rephrasing the main ideas for clarity. A clearer structure would enhance your argument.
task achievement
In the body paragraphs, try to provide more examples that support your argument. Specific examples strengthen your ideas and make them more convincing.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure your conclusion summarizes the key arguments you have made in the essay more clearly. This will help reinforce your point of view better.
task achievement
You have effectively presented both sides of the debate, which demonstrates a balanced approach to the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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