Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think it is important for children to go to school. Discuss both the advantages of each method and give your own opinion.

#people #children #home #child’s #development #school #method

One of the major issues that concern our society today is whether youngsters should get educated from

home

or whether they should go to

school

. Strong arguments exist on both sides, which implies that it is worth examining both points of

views

Fix the agreement mistake

view

show examples

before reaching any conclusion. One argument put forward by those who advocate that it is beneficial for

children

to take

home

lessons

instead

of going to

school

is that young people feel more comfortable sharing their ideas.

For example

although

many students know the answers

Change preposition

show examples

their teacher's questions, they

are not feel

Change the verb form

do not feel

show examples

free to communicate

them

Change preposition

with them

show examples

because maybe they think that either their answers will be wrong or they do not have

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

confidence.

For

this

reason, some parents believe that if

children

start taking

home

lessons

they will have better grades.

On the other hand

, numerous individuals are opposed to

this

viewpoint arguing that

school

plays a pivotal role in adolescents' life. They believe that

school

except

for

Change preposition

show examples

an educational place is

also

a place where

children

can spend their day in a creative way. To be more precise, in

school

students have the opportunity to attend

also

to art

lessons

as well as

there are

lessons

regarding

gymnastic

Fix the agreement mistake

gymnastics

show examples

which make

children

feel relaxed and calm. As opposed to

home

lessons

in which young people need to stay in a room for many hours. To my mind,

school

is essential for students because in

this

way they can

also

improve their social skills.

For example

, they have the opportunity to interact with their peers and exchange their views.

Also

, they can make new friends and bond with them.

This

is something that I think is crucial for their mental health.

Add a hyphen

In-home

show examples

home

lessons

Add a comma

,lessons

show examples

they do not have

this

chance because they interact only with their teachers.

As a result

, they end up feeling lonely. In conclusion, it is my firm belief that youngsters need to attend courses at

school

and not at

home

because it is vital for their well-being. Never before have we seen so many

home

lessons

to be taken, as it is a modern way of education.

Submitted by eirininikou109 on Sat Apr 01 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

354 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think it is important for children to go to school. Discuss both the advantages of each method and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people enjoy change and look forward to new experiences. Others like their lives to remain the same and do not like any changes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that all entertainment TV programme should educate people about the importance of social issue. To what extent do your agree or disagree.

Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born. What might be the reasons for this? What are the advantages and disadvantages?

The old generation often hold traditional ideas about the correct way of life, thinking and behavior. However, some people think that these ideas are not helpful for young people to prepare for modern life. To what extent do agree or disagree?

Some people believe that exercise is the key to good health while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.