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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #world
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Nowadays
people
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 cannot ignore collaborative work and giving a hand to
others
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. A group of
people
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 believe that more relied on each other.
However
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,
others
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 suppose that
people
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 are more autonomous. From my perspective, I believe that we have become more reliant than at any time in history.
Due to
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 technological advancements,
people
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 are becoming lazier than ever. These days the majority of them depend on the internet to achieve their responsibilities and tasks. Despite the advantages that come from using the internet, it gives them a chance to be more reliant on
others
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.
For example
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,
people
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 rely on
others
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 to prepare food for them
while
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 they are away or at their work.
Furthermore
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, technology has made
people
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 too busy and stay outside their homes for a long time.
Therefore
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, parents depend on babysitters to upbringing their children and take care of them.
On the other hand
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, in the present generation, there is a percentage of
people
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 who are educated and tend to be more self-reliant because independence gives them confidence and freedom, particularly the young generation.
For instance
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, students tend to do part-time work during their studies in order to fulfil their needs without getting help from their parents.
In addition
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 to that, most of them take their own decisions about their future or pursuing their career since they want to depend on themselves. In conclusion,
although
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 in certain ways
people
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 are more independent, it is generally the case that
people
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 now live more dependent lives. .
Submitted by ahmadalshraa1515 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • interdependence
  • globalization
  • technological advancements
  • collective action
  • digital evolution
  • minimal reliance
  • direct interaction
  • empowered
  • access to technology
  • societal expectations
  • personal choice
  • leverage
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