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Band 5.5

Some people use social media to keep in touch with other people and news events. Do you think advantage of technology outweigh the disadvantages

#people #media #touch #news #events #advantage #technology
This
 day, most people need social
media
 to stay updated with their loved ones and other people. I positively agree with
this
way
 to communicate with others. Nowadays, in
this
generation
Add a comma
,generation
show examples
 we are more in relying
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
on social
media
 to have a more effective
way
 when it comes to
communicating
Wrong verb form
communicate
show examples
 in long-distance relationships even with our loved ones ,unlike the old ways of past generations using email or writing a letter and getting letter email for about less than a month or worse more than a month in
such
 action drawbacks to the misunderstanding of individuals, much worried to their family far away what her or his condition, and especially to a person who are suffering from an illness they need more emotional support.
In addition
, I am much more pro to social
media
 since
this
 is a new generation and it gives convenience to us. Getting accurate information about other members of the family is going through the easiest
way
 just to call them anytime you want; it is a relief and a better practice of communicating especially for those people who can't go to their family when having a crucial event because of financial status
this
 is the
way
 to reach out and witness what does the real happen. In my conclusion, in
this
 world there are many positive effects and drawbacks when you use social
media
 since you are the one who used to; you need more responsible on how is the proper to use
this
 and
also
 know the disadvantages
such
 as ways you can handle it for a long time and help all of us that don't need to worry about the effects and benefits.
Submitted by cristelsarondo on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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