IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some think the current generation should take steps to protect the environment for the next generation.to what extend do you agree or dis agree.

#think #generation #steps #environment #dis
Environmental threats are undeniable for the upcoming
generation
. Few individuals find the present
world
 to be responsible
to secure
Change preposition
for securing
show examples
 the
environment
 for the
future
world
. I fully agree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the notion and
this
 essay will discuss the logical reasons for my agreement, followed by a brief conclusion.
Firstly
, present environmental concerns will become severe issues for the upcoming humanity.
This
 means,
if
Correct word choice
that if
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
issues like global warming are not dealt with by the current
generation
 it will gradually result in unbearable
variation
Fix the agreement mistake
variations
show examples
 in the temperature across the
world
.
Also
, the upcoming
generation
 will have no fresh air to breathe if no appropriate steps are taken to control the escalating pollution level.
Consequently
, the life span in the
future
 will shorten
due to
 severe respiratory diseases.
For example
, scientists have predicted that the number of deaths
due to
 asthma will spike up to 35% by the year 2035.
Hence
, immediate actions are required.
Secondly
,
deforestation
 must
also
 be dealt with by the current
generation
 to secure the
environment
 for the upcoming population.
This
 is because the adverse effects of a steep incline in
deforestation
 in today's time are already being suffered by the present
environment
.
For instance
, unpredictably heavy rainfall, unexpected flooding, soil erosion, drought and many more.
Hence
, the upcoming
generation
 will suffer even more severe consequences if the pattern of
deforestation
 remains the same.
Therefore
, steps to resolve
this
 issue are indeed required to make the
future
world
 livable. In conclusion, It is certainly our responsibility to take the
initiate
Replace the word
initiative
show examples
 in restoring the earth's atmosphere and
environment
 to minimize environmental threats like
deforestation
, pollution and, global warming so our
future
generation
 can live a happy and healthy life.
Submitted by ankit.heart25 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
Ensure that the essay directly addresses all aspects of the prompt and consistently maintains a clear position throughout the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas in each paragraph and use cohesive devices to connect the ideas more effectively.
Lexical Resource
Enrich the variety and precision of vocabulary by using a wider range of lexis to express ideas more precisely.
Grammatical Range
Enhance grammatical accuracy and demonstrate a wider range of grammatical structures and sentence types throughout the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental conservation
  • sustainable practices
  • carbon footprint
  • renewable energy
  • deforestation
  • pollution
  • climate change
  • ecosystem
  • biodiversity
  • waste management
  • conservation
  • global warming
  • greenhouse gases
  • natural resources
  • renewable resources
  • fossil fuels
  • reducing emissions
  • eco-friendly
  • recycling
  • alternative energy
What to do next:
Look at other essays: