Films and computer games which contain violence are very popular. Some people believe that they have a negative effect on society and so should be banned. Other people, however, say that they are just harmless and help people to relax. Discuss both points of view and five your own opinion.

Digital
products
which are containing violence are very popular among
people
. Some citizens believe that these materials negatively affect to community and should be banned. Other citizens,
however
, believe that they are
innocents
Fix the agreement mistake
innocent
show examples
and help individuals to relax. From my point of view, they are just harmless and excellent
products
to relax
for
Change preposition
in for
show examples
spare
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
.
Firstly
, films and computer
games
serve different ideas and lessons for consumers. One of the beneficial
effect
Change to a plural noun
effects
show examples
of digital materials is improving analytical thinking.
The consumers
Correct article usage
Consumers
show examples
developing
Wrong verb form
develop
show examples
their basic ideas
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
a certain topic,
moreover
, these ideas have become more realistic and analytic which can be beneficial in their daily lives.
In addition
, these
products
improve
problem-solving
Correct article usage
the problem-solving
show examples
skills of children.
Due to
improved multiple skills, these children can avoid
procastination
Correct your spelling
procrastination
in their future careers.
This
chain reaction reveals that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
digital
products
are nourishing
cognitive
Correct article usage
the cognitive
show examples
functions of individuals over time.
Secondly
, video
games
and streaming services are increasing
reflexes
Correct article usage
the reflexes
show examples
of juveniles and young adults.
It is clear that
one part of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society is considering video
games
as
violant
Correct your spelling
violent
.
This
belief is coming from many video
games
, especially
genre
Correct article usage
the genre
show examples
of first-person
shooter
Fix the agreement mistake
shooters
show examples
,
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
containing shooting and
violance
Correct your spelling
violent
elements.
Nevertheless
, they should be aware of the purpose
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
gaming. These activities only simulate
competitive
Correct article usage
the competitive
show examples
habitats of players
not
Add the comma(s)
,not
show examples
realities.
For instance
, Half-life is a popular first-person shooter
game
which has
played
Add a missing verb
been played
show examples
over
Change preposition
by over
show examples
10 million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
.
This
game
represents
post-apocalyptic
Correct article usage
the post-apocalyptic
show examples
future of the world and some successful university graduates were addicted
this
Change preposition
to this
show examples
game
.
However
, I believe, none of these students tried to vanish
society
Change preposition
from society
show examples
with
Correct article usage
a gravity-gun
show examples
gravity-gun
Correct your spelling
gravity gun
show examples
which is a type of weapon in the
game
. In conclusion, consuming digital items which are containing violence
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
really popular. Because of the negative effects on
community
Add an article
the community
a community
show examples
, some
people
suggesting
Wrong verb form
suggest
show examples
that
products
should be banned. Other
people
think that they are just harmless innocent materials as I think.
Submitted by historicalpen on

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  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • desensitize
  • aggressive behavior
  • vulnerable groups
  • stress relief
  • media literacy
  • creative expression
  • censorship
  • rating systems
  • parental guidance
  • economic implications
  • mitigate
  • outlet for aggression
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