IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

«Prevention is better than cure». Researching and treating diseases is too costly so it would be better to invest into preventative measures. To what extent do you agree?

#«prevention #cure» #diseases #measures
Finding cures and health treatments are highly expensive compared to preventative actions that could be taken in order to avoid medical expenses.
Firstly
, the majority of illnesses that affect most of the population could be prevented by implementing nutrition programs. Diabetes, cardiovascular-related and digestive-related problems
such
 as colon cancer among others are caused by a poor and deficient diet. Namely, The excess of sugar, refined flour, saturated fats and lack of fibre in our daily food lead to most of the conditions above mentioned.
Thus
, a change in feeding habits can be achieved by educating people which can result in a better life quality.
Moreover
, an educational plan in order to create awareness regarding the importance of nutrition might be significantly less costly than long-term treatments and hospitalization. Namely, a television campaign, school workshops or subjects dedicated to instructing adults and kids on how to wisely choose and prepare their meals are great alternatives for prevention at a reduced cost.
For example
, The price of colon cancer therapy for just a few patients can be equivalent to a TV campaign. 
Therefore
, I personally agree with the fact that investing in prevention costs less than healing.
To sum up
, the expenses incurred by curing most of the common and deadly illnesses could be reduced by educating the population on how to take care of themselves through well-balanced nutrition.
Submitted by davindergill98 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: