many museums charge for admission while others sre free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Charging
people
Use synonyms
for admission
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
museums is a topic of discussion. In my opinion, the benefits of
this
Linking Words
issue outweigh the drawbacks. The first reason is about having more
money
Use synonyms
to buy amenities for
people
Use synonyms
who are visiting the area. Because
people
Use synonyms
will
more
Add a missing verb
be more
show examples
motivate to
visit
Use synonyms
the museums to gain knowledge about the different
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, when an art
museum
Use synonyms
brings a band who
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
playing an Asian-songs, van
attract
Change the verb form
attracts
show examples
people
Use synonyms
to
visit
Use synonyms
it even by paying an expensive ticket. So, by charging
people
Use synonyms
, these areas can improve their facilities.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the second one would be about adding
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
department every year
due to
Linking Words
improve the
museum
Use synonyms
among other
places
Use synonyms
by bringing a new category in their department.
For instance
Linking Words
, the Ontario
Use synonyms
museum
Correct your spelling
Museum
show examples
can increase the price of
Add an article
a ticket
the ticket
show examples
ticket
Fix the agreement mistake
tickets
show examples
to bring a new part
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
their building
such
Linking Words
as Iranian culture.
Hence
Linking Words
,
whit
Correct your spelling
what
show examples
money
Use synonyms
, they can have a new history section in their areas.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, charging
people
Use synonyms
for admission to museums can bring negative points
such
Linking Words
as the local
people
Use synonyms
might not
visit
Use synonyms
those
places
Use synonyms
and the managers can hold the
money
Use synonyms
and use it for themselves.
However
Linking Words
, citizens may not
visit
Use synonyms
these
places
Use synonyms
but it is not a big deal because
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
will cover it up.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, some managers will keep that
money
Use synonyms
and use it for themselves
whereas
Linking Words
the government will check
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
places
Use synonyms
and never let someone do
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
black
money
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, charging
people
Use synonyms
for admission is a good idea and the advantages of it outnumber the drawbacks for two reasons, one is about preparing new facilities for that place and the other one is about building
a new departments
Correct the article-noun agreement
new departments
a new department
show examples
and
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
a new history section
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
their
museum
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by mahsa_shafie1996 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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