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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Schools are no longer necessary, because children can get so much information available through the Internet, and they can study just as well at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?（

#schools #children #information #internet #study #home
The
Internet
 is developing at a surprising speed and is changing the whole way of our life and education.
Although
 there are some people who argue that in
this
 case,
students
 can learn by themselves at home, I still disagree about
this
 opinion because even though the
Internet
 plays an important role in pupils’ study,
school
 education is still indispensable. Admittedly, the
Internet
 can really help
students
 study a lot
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because people from all over the world can share knowledge and ideas here, regardless of geographical restrictions.
This
 will broaden teenagers' horizons and help them develop in an all-round way. To be more specific, when
students
 search on the
Internet
 for a problem which they are interested in, they can find not only the situation in the local area but
also
 in other parts of the world.
For example
, search engines
such
 as Baidu can help them take a more holistic, multi-perspective view of the problem.
However
, the role of a
school
 is almost irreplaceable for a student.
This
 is because the growth of
students
 not only needs knowledge learning but
also
 needs the cultivation of social skills. As
school
 is like a tiny society,
students
 can learn how to get
along with
 others properly and gain valuable friendships in it before entering society.
For example
, schools can provide
students
 with a vairy of opportunities to increase
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
communication and division of labour among
students
, like asking the youth to make a presentation.
This
 can result in
achievement
Add an article
the achievement
show examples
 of the purpose of "cooperation", a must master the skill. All in all, we can find out that even in the information era,
school
 is actually necessary and should encourage the youth to acquire computer skills to ensure a better future.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social development
  • fostering communication
  • personalized guidance
  • immediate feedback
  • replicated
  • structured environments
  • discipline
  • time management skills
  • extracurricular activities
  • nurture talents
  • inculcate
  • sense of community
  • shared learning experiences
  • equal access
  • learning opportunities
What to do next:
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