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Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries, children are often told that can achieve anything if they try hard enough.

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Nowadays, many adolescents become successful from early childhood.
Therefore
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, in some nations
hard working
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hard-working
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 considered
as
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apply
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a key trait for youngsters to achieve goals.
Nevertheless
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, pressure from adults for hard effort may have both disadvantages and advantages. On the one hand, hard work from early
ages
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age
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 may have
negative
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a negative
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 impact on health.
For example
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, in Central Asian countries it is common choosing
the
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a
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 future career of
children
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 by
parents
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.
Thus
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,
children
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 starting from school ages make a persistent effort to become
best
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the best
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student
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students
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, after school time they have extra classes to enter the university and they have no time to relax.
However
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, if their attempts to achieve these goals
fails
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fail
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, they will feel anxiety,
stress
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and stress
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, they will lose self-confidence and even in some cases, it can lead to suicide.
Moreover
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, hardworking is
not
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the not
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only
Correct article usage
the only
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 factor to achieve something desired,
conversely
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,
it
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but it also
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 limits
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children
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children's
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 development.
On the other hand
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, there is a statement "Dreams do come true if you work hard". Encouraging
children
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 to make
hard
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a hard
the hard
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effort
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efforts
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 for success has tremendous positive sides.
For instance
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, it makes youngsters ambitious and confident; they will develop a sense of
thirsty
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thirst
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 to achieve anything they wish. In my point of view,
children
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 should
be raise
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be raised
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 without pressure from
parents
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, since they may lose their own opinion and understanding
what
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of what
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 they want.
Instead
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,
parents
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 should motivate them in that path and interest which their
children
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 want. In conclusion,
parents
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 from some nations exaggerate the strength of hard
working
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work
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 which may lead to awful consequences. In my opinion,
parents
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’ pressure to try hard should be moderate, as it
also
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 has positive aspects on
well-being
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the well-being
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 of
children
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.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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