Many people think that happiness relies upon the individuals, while others think it is affected by other factors. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no doubt that these days some people consider that when you have a big
difference
is a nice thing. The question is, is it an amazing thing to have significant
age
between the
parents
and the
kids
? In
this
essay, I am going to draw some of the advantages and disadvantages. In terms of advantages. there is a minor problem when they get a different
age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages
show examples
between the
kids
and the patients. The main reason given to support
this
claim is that The biggest
difference
is the thinking that will make the opposite. To illustrate, some of the
children
have stress because their
parents
do not understand them.
In other words
, the
children
maybe will hate their
parents
because they have a different think.
However
, there is some positive side to a
difference
in
age
between the
parents
and the
kids
.
Firstly
, the
kids
if grow up they will help their
parents
.
In other words
, when the father or mother gets tired their child will stay with them and give care until be good.
Secondly
, The father ought not to work. Because His son will give him money to buy what he needs.
Also
, The
parents
will be happy. Because Thier
children
will make food and clean their home. In conclusion, The
difference
in
age
sometimes is a great thing.
However
, some time will be a bad thing.
Also
, I believe that they have to get
children
children
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
between the ages of 27 and 30
this
is a good
age
to have
children
.
Submitted by mshal2547 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: