IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The table shows the number of employees and factories producing silk in England and Wales between 1851 and 1901.

The table shows the number of employees and factories producing silk in England and Wales between 1851 and 1901.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table depicts the data of
employees
Use synonyms
 numbers
along with
Linking Words
 factories which produce silk in England and Wales Within a time span of ten
years
Use synonyms
, commencing from 1851 till 1901,
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly seen that the number of female
employees
Use synonyms
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 generally higher than men
employees
Use synonyms
 number,
as well as
Linking Words
 the drop in
employees
Use synonyms
 numbers in both gender over the
years
Use synonyms
, Glancing at the table reveals a gradual downfall from 1851 to 1901of operators numbers in both male and female genders , it’s illustrated by 76,786
employees
Use synonyms
 in 1851 fell to 25, 527 in 1901, in the contrast, 53,964 operator’s ratio in 1851 palpitated to 13,375
employees
Use synonyms
 in 1901, but the proportion of women was throughout the
years
Use synonyms
 higher than men proportion, in the meanwhile, the number of factories had grown rapidly from 272 factories to 761 in just 10
years
Use synonyms
, exactly between 1851 and 1851, but, it registered a moderate drop and fall till the early of 19th,

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Contractions: Don't use contractions.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words employees, years with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "drop" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Industrial expansion
  • Manufacturing hub
  • Technological innovation
  • Economic contribution
  • Productivity enhancement
  • Global market dynamics
  • Urbanization
  • Workforce demographics
  • Production scale
  • Social implications
What to do next:
Look at other essays: