Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Financial subsidies are the most common
methods
for wealthy Fix the agreement mistake
method
countries
to solve poverty
issues in other nations, however
, the situation barely changed. Despite such
countermeasures could achive
short-term goals, there are better means of solution to cope with Correct your spelling
achieve
poverty
, hence
, I strongly agree with such
opinions.
On the one hand, there are various drawbacks derived from offering financial support to poor countried
, Correct your spelling
countries
such
as provoke
a Wrong verb form
provoking
corraped
Correct your spelling
corrupt
corrupted
government
using money
for their own benefitsAdd an article
the money
,
and Remove the comma
apply
leave
residents Wrong verb form
leaving
continue
to struggle under Add the particle
to continue
poverty
line. Add an article
the poverty
For example
, Congo is known as one of the most poor
regions in the world, despite many advanced Change the adjective
poorest
countries
such
as the USA invest in
Wrong verb form
investing
million
and thousands Fix the agreement mistake
millions
to
their Change preposition
in
government
annually, the situation remained unchanged these years. That is
to say, the financial support from rich countries
is fail
to cope with Change the verb form
is failing
poverty
.
On the other hand
, there are some means of solutions for poverty
that could derive a profoundly
Replace the word
profound
achivement
. First of all, advanced Correct your spelling
achievement
countries
could cultivate local residents with necessary
skills , allowing people from poor families to have better job opportunities to break the cycle of Correct article usage
the necessary
poverty
. For instance
, government
in Taiwan sent many professional Add an article
the government
team
to many Change to a plural noun
teams
countries
in Africa to teach them the knowledge of agriculture to help local farmer
Fix the agreement mistake
farmers
to
increase their Verb problem
apply
productivities
. Fix the agreement mistake
productivity
Secondly
, it is better to assist local government
to improve
local construction, including Change preposition
in improving
transportation
system Correct article usage
the transportation
instead
of just offer
money. It could not only provide a convenience to local residents but could attract more visitors from overseas.
To summarise, I strongly agree with the suggestion that rich Wrong verb form
offering
countries
should not provide only money to solve poverty
since such
methods barely changed
anything. It is time to implement other ways, including providing education or help with their local construction, to make real differences Wrong verb form
change
on
Change preposition
in
current
situation.Add an article
the current
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Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay addresses the topic but fails to develop a fully coherent argument. The introduction does not clearly state your position. Ensure that each paragraph contains a clear main idea and that supporting sentences relate directly to it. Work on making a clear and logical flow of ideas from introduction to conclusion.
Task Achievement
You have attempted to address the task, however, your response lacks a clear opinion throughout the essay. Ensure that you present a clear thesis statement in your introduction and restate your opinion in the conclusion for a complete response. Also, make sure each paragraph contributes to your overall opinion on the issue for a more focused task achievement.