IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.
#men #women #education #britain #three #periods #report #university #lecturer #information
The bar chart illustrates the amount of the British who took future
education
 either full-time or part-time categorized by gender during three different periods. It was measured in thousands of
people
.
Overall
, it can be seen that part-time
education
 was far
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
preferable to full-time
education
 regardless of gender throughout the time frame.
To begin
, at the beginning of the
period
, between 1970 and 1971, part-time
education
 for men had ten times more British than full-time
education
, at just one million
people
 and around 100,000
people
 respectively. The pattern of part-time
education
 fluctuated over the following 20 years, dropping to less than 900,000
people
 from 1980 to 1981, and
then
 increasing slightly to approximately 900,000
people
.
In contrast
 to males, there was a constant increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 part-time
education
 for females during the
period
. Moving on to full-time
education
, the pattern of both genders had a similar trend, with both increasing gradually.
However
, there were more men than women at the beginning of the
period
,
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 gap between them narrowed and eventually got equal
at the end
 of the
period
, at approximately 250,000
people
.
Submitted by nanamach87 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words education, people, period with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • engaged in
  • distinct
  • categorizes
  • enrollment status
  • surpass
  • compared to
  • stability
  • increased significantly
  • equal number
  • gap
  • outnumber
  • decreased
  • part-time courses
What to do next:
Look at other essays: