Some people believe that studying at a university or college is the best route to successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views.

In the modern era, the topic of education has emerged as a critical issue for the general public.
While
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it is often argued that continuing to learn at a university or college is the best way to develop a career, others firmly believe that finding a
job
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after graduating from high school helps them have a better life.
This
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essay provides a thorough examination of these contrasting perspectives. On the one hand, it is imperative to recognise that there are a multitude of reasons why people want to learn after leaving high school. A pivotal point to consider is that a university equips deeper knowledge and harder insights for individuals who want to pursue their own ambition or dream.
Thus
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, students can have more academic knowledge and gain the qualifications or achievements which suit the employers’ requirements nowadays.
For example
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, in Vietnam, students who graduate with an engineering degree are highly paid and easy to get a good
job
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. An additional crucial aspect to highlight is that beyond teaching knowledge, students might learn more necessary skills
such
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as teamwork, problem-solving, time management and more skills.
Therefore
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, they would not feel worried or scared when they work in a company, and show skills to demonstrate their values and talents.
On the other hand
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, it is significant to examine that those who study vocational training classes should not be underestimated. A noteworthy aspect to consider is that learning vocational classes earlier helps them gain more experience.
This
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gives them the chance to get a promotion in their career quickly.
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, it is essential to underscore that they can be able to earn money as soon as possible if they find a
job
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after graduation.
This
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assertion is supported by the fact that having a
job
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leads to more maturity
,
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apply
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and living independently on their own income. In conclusion, an analysis of different perspectives highlights that studying at a college and getting a
job
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straight after school have their own advantages.
This
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examination prompts individuals to consider their preferences and experiences that influence their concerns thoughtfully.

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task
Make the main idea in each paragraph clearer with a topic sentence. This helps the reader know what you will show.
task
Add one or two more clear examples to back up each point. This adds depth to your answer.
coherence
Link your ideas with simple glue words like 'also', 'however', 'for this reason' to improve flow.
coherence
Check if each paragraph has a clear start and end. Shorter sentences can make the flow smooth.
task
The essay shows both sides of the topic.
coherence
There is a clear link with 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' to show contrast.
task
Intro and conclusion exist and keep the idea.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Academic qualifications
  • Specialized skills
  • In-depth knowledge
  • Personal growth
  • Social development
  • Practical experience
  • Financial independence
  • Career progression
  • Professional networking
  • Education
  • Work experience
  • Successful career
  • Personal interests
  • Career goals
  • Decision-making process
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