A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public. Write a letter to the company. In your letter - describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team - summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts - say how you think the company should spend the money Write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

#company #area #amount #money #sponsor #children #sports #team #two #years #concerts #feedback #summarise #addresses #sir #madam

Dear Sir or Madam My name is Daniel Kong, and I am from the general public. I'm writing

this

letter to appreciate your company can spend a large amount of money to sponsor our teenager's sports for the next two years or pay for concerts.

Firstly

this

will be an excellent platform for children to improve their sports talent.

Also

, they can learn how to work with their teammate and enhance body health, which is essential.

Secondly

, there have a lot of benefits to

pay

Wrong verb form

paying

show examples

for the concerts. People who can show the public their distinctive.

For example

, sing-song and dance.

Also

, it can reduce some pressure from work when people enjoy the concerts. From my point of view. The company can sponsor children for one year.

Furthermore

, the rest of the money can pay for one concert. I believe it is bests for both opinions. All the best Daniel Kong

Submitted by danielyuhengqu on Thu Apr 13 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

151 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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