Nowadays more and more older people who need employment have to compete with younger people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are the solutions?

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Today in the business world, there is
increasing significance
Replace the word
increasingly significant
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of
Change preposition
apply
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competition between older people and younger people for the same jobs. The primary issue of
this
phenomenon is not only the impact on
relationships
between colleagues in the company but
also
leads to
stress’s
Change preposition
stress on
show examples
individuals and mental
health
and the most viable solution is to build a good relationship and support the employee in
stress
and mental
health
.
To begin
with, the primary concern of
this
phenomenon is poor
relationships
between old
employees
and young
employees
. Particularly, when they need to be competitive to get the same high position,
this
is negative in friendships,
such
as avoiding
talk with
Wrong verb form
talking
show examples
together, and impacts the environment in
workplace
Add an article
the workplace
show examples
. Another issue is the impact on mental
health
. Some individuals who do not persist in the
stress
of rivalry may lead to mental
health
,
such
as depression , anxiety, and burnout.
This
means that people cannot concentrate on the task, so it impacts the effectiveness of the product.
For example
, a recent found that if the company had competition, it would lead to
stress
among
employees
. To combat these problems, companies should build
relationships
between colleagues even if they are preparing for competition by encouraging good activities.
For instance
, some companies were supporting good activities for building positive
relationships
by exercising after work time resulting in increased good
relationships
because
employees
can talk together after work time, as found in a recent study.
Additionally
, companies should support staff with
stress
through training about reducing
stress
in workplaces or consulting for
employees
. In conclusion,
this
phenomenon has issues which are bad
relationships
and mental
health
problems. So, the solution is encouraging good activities and training about reducing
stress
.
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task response
The essay addresses the topic but lacks clear development of ideas and relevant examples. More specific examples and detailed explanation are needed to support the main points.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but need clearer connection to the main ideas. The essay lacks consistent logical structure and coherence between paragraphs. Clearer topic sentences and linking devices are needed to improve coherence and cohesion.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Intergenerational competition
  • Age discrimination
  • Adaptability
  • Hiring practices
  • Workforce diversity
  • Upskilling
  • Lifelong learning
  • Flexible working arrangements
  • Ageism
  • Technological proficiency
  • Productivity concerns
  • Diverse skillsets
  • Legislative protection
  • Employment equity
  • Biases
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