The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#process #sugar #cane #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making

sugar

Use synonyms

from

sugar

Use synonyms

cane.There are seven steps from compleat to

sugar

Use synonyms

. Looking at the graph as a whole, there are seven steps in

older

Correct your spelling

order

show examples

to growing,harvesting,crushing,purifying

juice

Use synonyms

,evaporator,centrifuge and

dring

Correct your spelling

drying

show examples

and cooling.As you can see we had a lot of time to can

sugar

Use synonyms

. In detail,

the first step is

Linking Words

growing. We

havr

Correct your spelling

have

to wait between 12 to 18 months

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can

sugar

Use synonyms

canes

Fix the agreement mistake

cane

show examples

,next step is that we have to

harvesting

Change the verb form

harvest

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

it by

show examples

machine and people,after that

sugar

Use synonyms

canes

crush

Replace the word

crushed

show examples

and they

are become

Change to the active voice

become

have become

show examples

juice

Use synonyms

.In

adition

Correct your spelling

addition

, we have to make purifying

juice

Use synonyms

Change preposition

with

show examples

limestone

fiter

Correct your spelling

filter

then

Linking Words

we have to

juice

Use synonyms

becomes syrup by

evaporator

Add an article

an evaporator

the evaporator

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

after that separates

sugar

Use synonyms

crystals from

syrup

Add an article

the syrup

show examples

Linking Words

Finally

Add a comma

,Finally

show examples

step is that we have to dry and

cooling

Wrong verb form

cool

show examples

them.So we can very easily buy

sugar

Use synonyms

from

Correct article usage

the supermarket

show examples

supermarket

Fix the agreement mistake

supermarkets

show examples

however

Linking Words

sugar

Use synonyms

has a lot of time to become

sugar

Use synonyms

so we have to more thinks.

Submitted by hatsudaya706 on Thu Apr 13 2023

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 90%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar, juice with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

151 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

manufacturing process
sugar cane
harvesting
transporting
factory
crushing
extracting
juice
filtering
impurities
heating
evaporating
syrup
boiling
crystallizing
sugar
separating
drying
packaging
distribution
stage
process

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The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibiliry. What are your opinions on this?

Over recent years, mobile phones have become an indispensable tool in our daily lives. However, there are several problems such as social and medical which must not be ignored. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of mobile phones.

Children are now less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some of people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory part of high school programs(for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You live on the fourth floor of a five-storey building which is not equipped with an elevator (lift). Write a letter to your neighbors and in your letter • introduce yourself • say what the problem is • ask the neighbors to agree on the installation of an elevator.