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the bar graph shows the global sales in billions of dollars of different types of digital games between 2000 and 2006

the bar graph shows the global sales in billions of dollars of different types of digital games between 2000 and 2006
#bar #sales #billions #dollars #games
The given bar graph gives
the
Correct article usage
apply
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data bout the global
sales
 in billions of dollars types of digital
games
 from 2000 to 2006.There are four digital
games
.They are mobile phone
games
,online
games
,console
games
 and handheld
games
. Looking at the graph as a whole, handheld
games
 are the most popular in
this
priode
Correct your spelling
period
.As you can see,in 2001, online
games
 are
meking
Correct your spelling
making
, and
also
 mobile phone
games
 are making in 2002. In detail,in 2001,
sales
 of handheld
games
over
Add a missing verb
were over
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the
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apply
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12bn,and
also
 the
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
promotion
 of
sales
 of it
around
Add a missing verb
was around
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 18bn in 2006.The
rete
Correct your spelling
rate
show examples
 of
sales
 of
console
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consoles
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 reached a peak of about 6bn in 2000,after that the proportion of
sales
 of it
steady
Change the word
steadily
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an
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apply
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increased until 2006.So
peopele
Correct your spelling
people
 do not use console
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
 from time to time.In 2001, online
games
 were
making
Change the form of the verb
made
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,
then
 the proportion of online
games
 increased
insiginificant
Correct your spelling
insignificant
 between 2001 and 2006.In 2001, around 1bn people buy
online
Add an article
the online
an online
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game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
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,
after
Correct word choice
and
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5years
Correct your spelling
5 years
 ago about 8bn people bought
online
Add an article
the online
show examples
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
.
Moreover
,the proportion of
user
Fix the agreement mistake
users
show examples
 mobile phone
games
 different about 4bn between 2002 and 2006.
Submitted by hatsudaya706 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, games, bn with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Trends
  • Surpassed
  • Advent
  • Steady growth
  • Fluctuating sales
  • Technological advancements
  • Proliferation
  • Year-on-year growth
  • Factors influencing
  • Peak sales
  • Demographic shifts
  • Engagement
  • Driving the sales
  • Blockbuster titles
  • Major game releases
  • Spurring
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