IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

#people #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country
Some people think some professional careers should
work
 in the
country
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
 they have trained,
others
Correct word choice
while others
show examples
 think that they should be unrestricted to have a job in another
country
. I would argue that every professional worker
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 to be free to select some
country
 for
work
 and would show discuss both views. A person who graduated from university,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
use many resources during their education in that
country
,
they
Correct word choice
and they
show examples
 should return them back by working in the same
country
 to serve a service.
For example
, a patient who lives in a
country
 and gets some disease should reach the public health aspect from a doctor who graduated from that
country
 sufficiency.
However
, I would show another aspect of these.
On the other hand
, someone should be able to pick up the
work
 in any
country
 which they want.
For instance
, an engineer should get the
opportunities
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunity
show examples
 to
work
 at a high-paid salary which
reasonable
Add a missing verb
is reasonable
show examples
 for their life.
In addition
 to somebody who came from
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 poor nation and get a scholarship to study in a developed
country
, they should provide their knowledge to their citizen to improve their own
country
. In conclusion,
although
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the
country
 in which professional workers have been trained or graduated should receive their resources returned during the worker's study or training. I would argue that the workers should get opportunities to choose another
country
 for do the job because they should get
appropriate
Add an article
an appropriate
show examples
 salary or go to develop their home city.
Submitted by vanil on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: