In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is often argued that people have to move away from their

families

Use synonyms

and

friends

Use synonyms

if they want to get a better job.

Although

Linking Words

there are some drawbacks to

this

Linking Words

decision, I believe that the benefits of working away from home are still more important than the drawbacks. On the one hand, moving away from

families

Use synonyms

and

friends

Use synonyms

could have some emotional and mental disadvantages. It is not an easy decision to find a job far from

families

Use synonyms

and relatives and try to be normal like in the past.

For instance

Linking Words

, in 2021, 62% of foreign employees working in Canada suffered from depression, and 77% of them said that they think about their

friends

Use synonyms

and

families

Use synonyms

most of the day.

Consequently

Linking Words

, they are unable to make a convenient connection with the new community they live in and sometimes can not find a well-matched partner in the new country.

Thus

Linking Words

, they persistently struggle with mental problems and it affects their performance.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, migrating to a new place and country to find a new occupation would improve the ability to be independent and make more money.

Firstly

Linking Words

, when people move away from their homeland to get a proper job in other

countries

Use synonyms

or regions, they have to stay on their own feet and learn how to manage their daily life and budget.

While

Linking Words

they did not care about their income and

expense

Fix the agreement mistake

expenses

show examples

in the past

due to

Linking Words

the parents' aid, they should be aware of their monthly turnover.

Secondly

Linking Words

, in some

countries

Use synonyms

due to

Linking Words

a myriad of reasons, the level of income for many works and positions is not sufficient.

As a result

Linking Words

, individuals, especially young people decide to migrate to developed

countries

Use synonyms

like Canada, Germany and The UK to find well-paid jobs. National Bureau of Statistics revealed that the minimum level of income in advanced economies is 40% higher than that of developing

countries

Use synonyms

. It is solid evidence for those who migrate to Western

countries

Use synonyms

to find proper work positions.

To sum up

Linking Words

, I believe that despite some negative points, the benefits of working far from

families

Use synonyms

and

friends

Use synonyms

outweigh the drawbacks.

hesam.kord.fSat Apr 27 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

To further improve, consider varying your sentence structures even more and make sure each paragraph flows seamlessly into the next with more sophisticated transitional phrases.

task achievement

For even higher scores, ensure your argument is balanced by exploring the disadvantages with the same depth as the advantages. While your essay leans positively, including more nuanced exploration of the cons would strengthen it.

coherence cohesion

Well-structured and clear introduction and conclusion.

task achievement

Relevant examples and statistics are used to support your arguments.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

354 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

relocation
employment prospects
professional development
cultural exposure
isolation
familial relationships
cost of living
career progression
mental health
significant life events
higher salaries
support families
broaden horizons
living standards

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
The Internet is generally considered as a blessing for mankind. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Social media is often regarded as a privilege for individuals, offering numerous benefits such as facilitating business-to-business transactions, serving as a communication tool, and functioning as a learning platform. These advantages are believed to outweigh the drawbacks of cyberbullying and addiction.
8
band
Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or a negative development?
Over the past few decades, there has been a profound increase in the number of individuals opting to interact with other people online and do not prefer to meet them in person. This essay agrees that this is a negative development as there is a lack of connection with local people and privacy can be breached.
7
band
You bought a new camera, but when you got it home, you noticed that it had some problems. You returned the camera and spoke with the company representative a week ago, but the camera still hasn't been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter: .Introduce yourself .Explain the situation .Tell us how you want the company to act
I am a researcher myself. I therefore needed a new and quality camera. I always go to the forest to photograph strange birds, strange plants and rare animals. I had an old camera but it fell and broke when I was shooting an animal. I needed a new camera. My friends recommended this company's product. I agreed to it. I bought him the latest fashion camera. It was recently produced. The employees there told me that it was produced only three days ago. And I bought that camera.
7
band
Some people think that students benefit greatly from going to private secondary schools, but others assert that private secondary schools have a negative impact on the young generation and the society alike. Discuss both views.
It is considered by some that private schools are beneficial for young people, while there are others who think it can be detrimental to students and society at large. On the one side, private schools can provide better education quality by inviting the best teachers and offering more personalized experiences, however, this money-based segregation contributes to social inequality.
8
band
The differences between countries are becoming less and less evident. People all over the world wear the same fashions, watch the same t.v. channels, use the same brands and have similar eating habits. Do you think that the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?
In the contemporary era of globalization, remarkable shifts are occurring across various facets of life, including fashion, entertainment, cuisine, and lifestyle habits. While some perceive these trends as fostering a sense of global unity and equality, others argue that they lead to the erosion of cultural diversity and local traditions. In my opinion, while globalization presents undeniable advantages in fostering interconnectedness and reducing prejudice, its drawbacks cannot be overlooked.

In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

The Internet is generally considered as a blessing for mankind. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or a negative development?

Some people think that students benefit greatly from going to private secondary schools, but others assert that private secondary schools have a negative impact on the young generation and the society alike. Discuss both views.

The differences between countries are becoming less and less evident. People all over the world wear the same fashions, watch the same t.v. channels, use the same brands and have similar eating habits. Do you think that the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?