IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that the government should help the unemployed on a weekly basis. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some individuals suppose that the unemployed should get weekly governmental help. I disagree with
this
Linking Words
 and tend to say that the
government
Use synonyms
 should develop a system of payments on a monthly basis. It is undeniable that unemployment is a relevant problem in both developed and developing countries. Each
government
Use synonyms
 should develop a special strategy for overcoming the problem and helping the unemployed,
however
Linking Words
, it should not be on a weekly basis
due to
Linking Words
 the reason that a lot of
people
Use synonyms
 without work could stop searching for it. They will be safe and sound and will not strive to come over the problem.
For example
Linking Words
, there was a book, where jobless
people
Use synonyms
 got a weekly allowance from their
government
Use synonyms
 and did not have to do anything for it.
As a result
Linking Words
, the percentage of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
unemployed increased.
Morever
Correct your spelling
Moreover
, weekly money could prevent the development of planning skills. If the
government
Use synonyms
 makes all the calculations and starts to help the unemployed on a weekly basis, these
people
Use synonyms
 lose their ability to make planes and spread their finances accurately.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 without critical thinking and basic financial literacy cannot be accounted as
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
qualified personnel, which can be
competetive
Correct your spelling
competitive
 in the labour market.
For example
Linking Words
, children, who have to plan their pocket money for the next month are more successful in their future than their coevals, which did not have to think about their monthly expenditures.
To sum up
Linking Words
, a weekly based allowance is not a brilliant idea and the
government
Use synonyms
 has to develop an alternative strategy for helping unemployed
people
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: