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Writing Samples
Band 5

WRITING TASK 1 The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

WRITING TASK 1 The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#shops #country #information #features #comparisons
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The given graph depicts
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 amount of
shops
Use synonyms
 separated by which closed and which opened from 2011 to 2018 in one specific country.
Overall
Linking Words
 it can be seen that there was a sharp decrease in the
number
Use synonyms
 of closed
shops
Use synonyms
 in the middle of the given period. We
also
Linking Words
 can see that
shops
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 that opened demonstrate a slight fall during the years. In 2011, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
shops
Use synonyms
 that were opened showed
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 highest peak of all the given timeframe, it was accounting for almost 9,000.
However
Linking Words
, it showed a slight decrease in the following years, and remained stable after 2015, achieving 3,000 in 2018.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in 2013 the
number
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 of
shops
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 that closed in that time reached a peak of almost 7,00,
then
Linking Words
 it suffered a dramatic fall in 2015, accounting for just 800, after that the
number
Use synonyms
 of closed
shops
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 presented
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 increase, and remained stable until 2013, being responsible for 5,000.
Submitted by Nayara on

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words shops, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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