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While mobile phones have many advantages, a number of problems have also resulted from them or the way in which they are used. What are some of these problems? What solutions can you suggest for solving these problems?

#phones
Even though
,
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apply
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 mobile
phones
 have many benefits, there are some resulting problems because of using
phones
 that cannot be ignored. In
this
 essay, I will outline some of the reasons that have contributed to
this problems
Change the determiner
this problem
these problems
show examples
as well as
 some solutions. On the one hand, a serious illness because of using
phones
 is poor sight. Our
phones
 are our true friends in today's world, and we utilize them most of the
time
.
This
 way of using
phones
 weakens our eyes' muscles
,
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apply
show examples
 and causes poor sight.
Moreover
, mobile
phones
 waste our
time
. Most
people
use
phones
over
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for over
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 5 hours a day. The usage of our
phones
 is not for calling and texting as before, but we
use
phones
 for watching movies, surfing the internet and keeping in touch with our family and friends. If we do not manage
our
Change the word
the
show examples
time
 that we
use
 the phone,
this
 object can waste our whole
time
.
On the other hand
, governments must teach
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
 how they can
use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
phones
 properly. It can hold workshops for adults and teach at
the
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apply
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schools for younger
people
. When
people
 know how they can
use
 their
phones
 for attaining their goals, they manage their usage
time
 of the
phones
.
In addition
, governments should pass strict rules for socializing with
people
 who are below the age of 18
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
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apply
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social
medias
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
. Most users of
phones
 are under
twenties
Change the article
the twenties
show examples
 and they can be
a
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apply
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great bait for
exploiting
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exploitation
show examples
. A serious issue that worries parents is to abuse
their
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of their
show examples
 children in the
cyber space
Correct your spelling
cyberspace
show examples
 and because of
this
 reason they control their children strictly, but it is not enough. We
also
 need to control the other side of
conversation
Add an article
the conversation
show examples
 to protect the future generation from misusing.
This
 control conserves young
people
 from
potential
Correct article usage
the potential
show examples
 dangers of
cyber space
Correct your spelling
cyberspace
show examples
. In conclusion, in spite of the fact that mobile
phones
 have many advantages, their drawbacks can not be overlooked. Poor sight and wasting
time
 are serious problems
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
phones
, and government must educate
people
how
Change preposition
on how
show examples
 they can
use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
phones
 appropriately and
who
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whom
show examples
 they can speak to.
Submitted by Maryamrajaeenia77 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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