IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #money #poverty #aid
Nowadays, developed
countries
 provide financial aid to undeveloped
countries
,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 it is not key to
solve
Wrong verb form
solving
show examples
this
 issue. But, rich
countries
 have to assist
other genre
Change the wording
another genre
other genres
show examples
 of help to poor
countries
instead
 of
money
.
Firstly
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
rich
Add an article
the rich
show examples
countries
 avoid
money
 help to give
richness
Replace the word
rich
show examples
countries
.
Therefore
, poor
countries
 need financial aid to develop.
Moreover
, there are several types of
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
show examples
such
 as human resources and military assistance so in my opinion, these are more
usefel
Correct your spelling
useful
 for poor
countries
. most people believe that rich
countries
 should provide
knowledge
 in order to redevelop and improve their finance
for example
,
buld
Correct your spelling
build
 a high quality of
uneversity
Correct your spelling
university
 and leisure sites that can help people in the country for the future as
knowledge
 is the most important thing for every
countries
Change to a singular noun
country
show examples
.
On the other hand
, there are health issues in poorer
countries
 so huge
countries
 should give some
engeners
Correct your spelling
engineers
 to
constarct
Correct your spelling
contact
contract
construct
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
 and
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
markets because there
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
 to be healthy cuisines and new technology
of
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in
show examples
clinic
Fix the agreement mistake
clinics
show examples
.
In addition
,
in
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apply
show examples
these days,
money
 can not help people to live
healthy
Change the word
healthily
show examples
due to
 rich
countries
 can not save but they can change their lifestyle and environment for
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 generation. The
countries
 that want to assist have to aim next generation to develop in the future.
To sum up
, rich
countries
 should avoid
money
 to help poor cities and
Correct article usage
the countrysides
show examples
countrysides
Fix the agreement mistake
countryside
show examples
due to
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
needs
Correct subject-verb agreement
need
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
knowledge
Add an article
the knowledge
a knowledge
show examples
 of the world and
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
 lifestyle. providing
skillful
Change the spelling
skilful
show examples
 tutors and talented
engeners
Correct your spelling
engineers
 who have
variety
Add an article
a variety
show examples
 of
knowledge
 is the most important aid.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • poverty alleviation
  • economic inequality
  • developing nations
  • foreign aid
  • sustainable growth
  • technical assistance
  • expertise
  • infrastructure
  • education
  • fair trade
  • trade barriers
  • sustainable development
  • environmental conservation
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