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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say that physical exercise should be a required part of every school day. Other people believe that students should spend the whole school day on academic studies. Which opinion do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer

#people #exercise #part #school #students #studies #support
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First of all,
education
 is the most important thing for improving countries. some educators hold
view
Add an article
the view
show examples
 that spending
time
 running or playing football effect on
education
 system. I believe that physical Exercise is vital for many students because it can improve their mental
health
. On the one hand, despite disagreeing that
sports
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school reduce learning
time
 , advocates believe that spending
time
 in the morning line is wrong behaviour. In other ,words the
time
 consumes playing kinds of
sports
 reduces
education
time
 .
Furthermore
, in some cases student exposure to some accidents during these
sports
 .
For instance
, there are many
sports
 need
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
more energy and
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
this
 energy
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 different
sports
 effect
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the understanding of the student .
Thus
, what can be said is that not only do
sports
 in school reduce
education
time
 , but they
also
causes
Change the verb form
cause
show examples
 many problems among students.
Nevertheless
, opponents and I are convinced that moving the body before learning is the most important factor for improving nervous
health
 . To illustrate , if pupils start their educational day with
sports
 they will achieve a high knowledge in their subjects.
For example
 , in one study published in a scientific journal , the study comparison between students who started their school day without physical exercises and others who did
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
sports
 before the study ,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 results showed
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
increasing mental
health
 after doing
sports
 .
hence
sports
 improve the body and brain. In conclusion ,
sports
 are vital for everyone to improve brain
health
 and soaring psych logical status. I am convinced that
sports
 are not luxury things
sports
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
part of life .
Submitted by abdellatife199 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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