The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (Co2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy, and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.
this
line graph illustrates Linking Words
average
carbon dioxide Correct article usage
the average
emissions
in four different countries for each person in metric tonnes.
Use synonyms
it is clear that
Linking Words
,
the amount of Remove the comma
apply
this
pollution generally declined in the UK and Sweden Linking Words
while
Linking Words
,
these statistics increased in Italy and Portugal in the period Remove the comma
apply
of
question.
Change preposition
in
according to
, Linking Words
although
the amount of CO2 in the UK dropped from almost 11 to 9 ,it has stood the highest Linking Words
emissions
per person until 2007. it is Use synonyms
also
maintained thatLinking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
emissions
of Sweden Use synonyms
firstly
Linking Words
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
a
Correct article usage
apply
significant
rose from above 8 to 10 in 1977, Change the word
significantly
then
it was starting to go down and remain Linking Words
roughly
5 in 2007. Sweden was one of the lowest countries of Co2 Change preposition
at roughly
emissions
per person in 2007.
Use synonyms
in addition
, the average of carbon dioxide kept rising from about 1 to 5 metric tonnes in Portugal though, it was the lowest rate during the given period. Linking Words
also
, the amount of Co2 in Italy increased sharply from roughly 4 to 8 in 2007 Linking Words
while
, increasing slightly after 1997.Linking Words
Submitted by amirhsina on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words emissions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 2 times.
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