The graph below shows female unemployment rates in each country of the United Kingdom in 2013 and 2014.

The line graph illustrates the changes in four village libraries over 4 months,

while

Linking Words

the

pie

Use synonyms

chart

Use synonyms

displays

percentage

Add an article

the percentage

show examples

of types of

book

Fix the agreement mistake

books

show examples

borrowed.

Overall

Linking Words

, the graph indicated significant fluctuations , with some places showing growth and others experiencing a decline, apart from a

pie

Use synonyms

chart

Use synonyms

represented

Wrong verb form

representing

show examples

the percentage amount of fiction, history, science, biography and self-help

books

Use synonyms

According to

Linking Words

the figure , West Eaton and Church Mount started with the smallest number in June,

Linking Words

however

Add the comma(s)

however,

show examples

it had a steady increase over the months, rising from 50 to 150 publications by September.

In contrast

Linking Words

, Ryeslip began with a quantity of 300

books

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but experienced

slight

Add an article

a slight

show examples

reduction , dropping 170

books

Use synonyms

by September. The next library that

standed

Correct your spelling

stood

show examples

out

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

Sutton Wood, a library with very high fluctuations in growth and decline. It started with 250

books

Use synonyms

in June, rose slightly in July, released

Change preposition

apply

show examples

100

books

Use synonyms

with a very sharp drop in August, and raised dramatically to 300 in September. As for the

pie

Use synonyms

chart

Use synonyms

, fiction

book

Fix the agreement mistake

books

show examples

held the largest share, making up 43% of the total,

while

Linking Words

biography accounted for 10%. History and science had nearly equal shares of fourteen per cent,

along with

Linking Words

Self-help held the mediocre share at 19%. It is noticeable that the data reveals that

while

Linking Words

West Eaton and Church Mount experienced consistent growth over the four months, overtaking Sutton Wood in deviations, Ryeslip showed a significant decline, paralleling the decreasing share of self-help

book

Fix the agreement mistake

books

show examples

in the

pie

Use synonyms

chart

Use synonyms

thus

Linking Words

highlighting a shift in both the number of the

books

Use synonyms

and the proportion of types.

dnm.best

Apr 24, 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Replace the words pie, chart, books with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "fluctuations" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.

▼

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

unemployment rates
female unemployment
data representation
overall trend
disparities
regional differences
insight
analysis
significant changes
employment policies

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The graph below shows female unemployment rates in each country of the United Kingdom in 2013 and 2014.

Multinational companies have become increasingly common in developing countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this method?

Some people regard video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that videos games are having an adverse effect on the people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits

Some people say that it is better to promote healthy lifestyles and a health diet than spend so much money to treat obese people.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Some people say that computer skills should be added to primary subjects in elementary school such as reading, writing and math. How far do you agree or disagree?

Young people committing crimes should be treated the same as adults by the authorities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?