IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008.

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008.
#show #uk #graduate #students #work #college
The column graphs illustrate the destinations of UK
graduate
 and postgraduate
students
 who did not go into full-tim3
work
 after leaving college in 2008. It can be clearly seen that the number of
graduate
students
 that has been investigated in
this
 essay
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 ten times more than postgraduates. As is presented, the number of
unemployment
Replace the word
unemployed
show examples
 in both charts is approximately the same in their own scales.
About
Change preposition
Regarding
show examples
 part-time
work
, it can be said that 17,735 people of
graduate
 and 2,535 persons of postgraduate
students
 had chosen that.Oppositely the
students
 who did voluntary
work
 stand
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
bottom
Add an article
the bottom
show examples
 of the list respectively (3,500 and 345).
Last
 but not least,the figure of
students
 who wanted to continue their
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
show examples
 has experienced a sharp rise. In a word, the
students
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
graduate
 and postgraduate
rating
Fix the agreement mistake
ratings
show examples
 had nearly similar selections to
work
 after leaving university in 2008.
Submitted by TUTOO on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words graduate, students, work with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Graduate
  • Postgraduate
  • Full-time work
  • Further education
  • Part-time work
  • Unemployment
  • Volunteering
  • Traveling
  • Gap year
  • Career progression
  • Job market
  • Transition
  • Academic life
  • Professional sphere
  • Economic factors
  • Social factors
  • Financial crisis
  • Long-term impact
What to do next:
Look at other essays: