Many people are choosing to move to cities. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?
In the modern era of science and technology, individuals are going to move to a good area.
Such
as cities. From my perspective, its advantages will outweigh the disadvantages because of the job opportunities and branded lifestyle, even they will become mature and creative.
The main advantage is that people are moving towards the city due to
facilities and careers. Because of this
most of the pupils are going to move abroad to grab ample knowledge and for getting good skills-based jobs. For example
, in India, about 90% of parents consider that their children will earn a reasonable amount of salary which will full fill
all the requirements so Correct your spelling
fulfil
that is
why their guardians sent their kids to rural areas due to
much multinational coordination exists in well-developed areas.
Owing to the different lifestyles individuals want to live in cities, they are not aware that
what will be going to happen in the future, but they will become mature and creative if children live far away from their houses, it can help them to learn how can you manage weekly expenses and other things like groceries and rent, which will help them to get to know two skills first time management and second money management. Change preposition
of
For instance
, in the united states
of America (USA) at the age of fifteen students Correct your spelling
United States
starts
to work which will help them to realise whether they can live without their parents or not, Correct subject-verb agreement
start
in other words
, their parents want to teach both skills at this
age. So, most of the population is living in Cities which will make their future brighter than ever.
In conclusion, the masses tend to move to rural areas. Its advantages will outweigh the disadvantage
owing to Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
this
, the students will get more jobs and fashionable
life.Correct article usage
a fashionable
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coherence cohesion
Please improve the clarity and relevance of your ideas to the topic. Organize your essay in a more structured and coherent manner. Provide relevant examples and ensure that the introduction and conclusion address the topic directly.
task achievement
Your essay lacks a clear and comprehensive response to the given topic. Ensure that you address all aspects of the prompt and provide a well-structured argument with relevant examples.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...