Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this positive or negative development?

#people #socialise #face #development

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The design of open spaces

instead

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of separate rooms is becoming increasingly popular in schools and companies. In my opinion,

this

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is a negative development which can lead to a lack of

privacy

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and lack of concentration. One serious problem that can arise from open space is that it can lead to a lack of

privacy

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In other words

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, employees are completely deprived of their

privacy

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, and their every move is watched by their bosses.

For example

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, when employees are tired from

work

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, they want to relax, but the boss is sitting right next to them, so they have to pretend that they have been working hard.

As a result

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, they will not enjoy their working atmosphere because of the limited

privacy

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. Another issue is that it is hard to concentrate. Simply put, when everyone shares the same space together, undoubtedly, the environment will be noisy.

This

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is because when people

work

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together, it's easy to be influenced by the behaviour of those around them.

For instance

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, when a person in the office laughs continuously, others will eventually laugh and start talking about it, and

this

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clearly can cause them not to be able to focus on their own

work

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Hence

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this

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may delay their

work

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and in some cases, it

also

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will affect their performance. In conclusion,

although

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it has become more popular for people , it has brought about too many problems for

this

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to be considered a positive trend. Employees would be more productive if the company created a comfortable and safe

work

Use synonyms

environment.

Submitted by s_syedy on Wed Apr 26 2023

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task response

Ensure that your essay fully addresses the prompt, providing a clear opinion on whether the trend of open spaces is positive or negative. Support your opinion with specific examples and a clear conclusion.

coherence cohesion

Your essay demonstrates good logical structure and coherence. However, consider using more cohesive devices such as linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your ideas.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

social media platforms
online interactions
virtual communication
global community
interpersonal skills
digital divide
cyberspace
virtual presence
social networking
mental wellbeing
digital literacy
safe spaces
marginalized groups
face-to-face communication
socialisation

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Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this positive or negative development?

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Some people think that it is the responsibility of governments to take care of the environment, while others believe that it is the responsibility of the citizens. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Some people think a job not only provides income but also social life. Others think it is better to develop social life with people you do not work with. Discuss both views and give your opinion