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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

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children are often encouraged to try hard so that they can accomplish whatever they desire.
This
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 upbringing method is utilized around the world and I will cover the advantages and disadvantages. The main positive outcome of
this
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 upbringing method would be personality development. Once they comprehend the importance of efforts, they will
more
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be more
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 likely to keep trying and become more patient. Even if they fail, they are willing to
leran
Correct your spelling
learn
 a lesson from their failures and believe in themselves.
As a result
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, their constant efforts often bring about desired
outsomes
Correct your spelling
outcomes
 but there are some drawbacks in some cases. One of the possible problems is burnout. When children put excessive pressure on themselves to achieve their goals, they may be exhausted both mentally and physically, which leads to
a
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apply
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health
problem
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problems
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. Another potential threat would be a lack of risk management. If a goal is unrealistic, it is unlikely
happen
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to happen
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.
For example
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, even if a person
want
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wants
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 to be rich and rely on
Correct article usage
a lottary
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lottary
Correct your spelling
lottery
 or casino, there is less than
one
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a one
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percent
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per cent
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 chance of
the
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apply
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winning. If anything, serious financial issues
such
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 as debts will rise.
Therefore
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, realistic goals are indispensable. In conclusion,
while
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 the message
that
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is that
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 sufficient efforts are crucial to
achieve
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achieving
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 anything
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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 children patient, stronger, and competitive, adults
such
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 as parents and educators need to navigate them to set up reachable goals and support them mentally and physically.

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
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